Besides helping others with their anxiety disorders, another significant area of passion for me is helping young people achieve success at school and in the world of work. And that is exactly what my new book coming out is all about: The PROM Model: Happiness and Success principles for TEENS.
As I begin to think about my workshop coming up in less than two weeks with the students at the Thornton Grammar school here in Bradford, West Yorkshire, I could not stop thinking about how privileged many young people are regarding accessing quality advice for their success, well-being and future.
In my days at school, as a teenager, there wasn’t any opportunity to learn from successful adults in a school setting or access any proper career advice services in town. For a long time, I did not know what what I really wanted to do with my life. And because of my lack of purpose, I often missed school, choosing rather to go hunting, instead of learning.
I had to walk across farmlands and forests for a few miles to and from school everyday. And, as you could imagine, it was a lot easier to be distracted or even scared to death with some dangerous animals such as snakes popping up sometimes as I walked through the long and narrow forest pathway, as well as some tantalising mango fruits and cashew apples on the trees as I made my way to school reluctantly everyday.
There wasn’t so much to look forward to. Nothing much to really dream about. School to me at that time was just a big unnecessary burden that some people somewhere decided that I had to carry. Even in the neighbourhood where I grew up, I had no idea that many basic things I now know or have access to existed. Everyone around me also lacked the adequate exposure middle-class lifestyle, let alone the upper middle-class.
The TV that could have helped escalate my sheer ignorance never really served the purpose. Because we used to live in total darkness 95% of the time due to constant power-cut. And if the power did come back on, our TV wouldn’t pick up any channels. I remember, my older brother and I risked our lives many times wandering into the jungle, looking for the tallest pole to use to make our TV external aerial. We thought maybe if we could find a straight kind of tree as tall as the heavens, perhaps we could get our old wretched black and white TV to educate us about what was happening somewhere else in the world – but all to no avail.
The cost of my ignorance was immense. I had to learn the had way almost everything many young people in the developed countries now take for granted, making several ignorant and foolish decisions that would later cost me very dearly.
But now that I am in a position to help young people avoid mistakes and failures early in life, I’m always trilled with every opportunity to make a positive difference. I can’t wait to start motivating and inspiring those kids with my stories and principles of success I have learnt, used, written about in my books and also thought to others.
Regarding personal achievement and performance, there are several systems, information and principles which have been used and tested by exceptional achievers for many years and are readily available in the public domain to use.
We do not have to reinvent the wheels in order succeed in life any more. Just follow the proven success principles and continue doing it and getting better at it it until you start getting the similar results others have got in life.
Now, one of the success models for peak performance, personal effectiveness, problem-solving and goal-setting I have used to help people in my personal success coaching programmes is the famous GROW Model. You probably are familiar with it if you are into coaching or in the corporate arena.
Because GROW can be used by anyone without special training, I will be sharing it with the Thornton Grammar school students and asking them to coach each other with the framework. It’s going to be really really good and very interesting!!! Really looking forward to that!!
One thing about the GROW Model is that it works very well for both for businesses and individuals in their day-to-day problem-solving . You can use it personally to achieve your goals and push through any barriers against your maximum productivity and effectiveness. Also you can use GROW to coach others to reach their goals quicker than expected and with more outputs than anticipated.
Here is the quick breakdown of the GROW Model and the relevant questions for each step:
The G.R.O.W Model
This is when you make very clear what you desire to achieve and when you want to achieve it. You must begin with the end in mind. Specificity and deadlines are very important concepts here. You have to be very specific with what you want and give your goal a specific time you intend to have achieved it.
Questions to ask yourself/client:
- What do I really want to achieve?
- When do I want to achieve it?
- How will achieving it benefit me?
This is when you assess your present reality. Before any goal can be achieved, you will have to identify where you are right now. Imagine trying to find your way to London using a map, but you don’t know where you currently are. It doesn’t really matter how good your map is. If you don’t know your starting point, you won’t get to your destination.
Questions to ask:
- What is my current reality?
- How far am I away from your goal?
- What issues, problems or challenges are currently stopping me from reaching your goals?
- What weaknesses do I have to overcome for me to reach my goal?
- What strengths do I already have or need to develop which may help me achieve my goal?
- What have I done so far specifically to achieve this goal?
After you know where you are (Reality) it’s then time to seriously look for what you can do that will move you towards your goals (Options). The options stage is really the brainstorming stage. This isn’t a time for selecting ideas, but a time for expanding ideas, stretching beyond what you or client, as the case may be, has tried or thought about before.
Questions to ask:
- What could I do that will help me to achieve this goal?
- What else……? What else….? What else…..? Keep thinking! Explore every option available.
- If you had a friend in a similar situation, what advice would you give to him?
4. WAY FORWARD
This is when the client agrees on the right and suitable options and commits to take action immediately. The options need to be converted into action-steps immediately, which will then take the client to his goal.
Questions to ask:
- Which option/options would be fastest?
- When will I take action?
- What might stop me from taking action immediately?
I hope this is any useful to you?
Submit your review