Try the following tips to overcome any kind of loneliness caused by Real-Self Alienation (to understand real-self alienation, read my previous article on overcoming loneliness):
- See your loneliness as an internal challenge, as opposed to external. Accept that the cause of your loneliness is beyond the fact that others do not care about connecting with you. Rather look at it as a battle confined to the walls of your mind. If you can win the battle of loneliness in your mind, you will definitely with the loneliness battle in your real world – what happens on the outside of you will also change drastically. After all, both your life experience and your external circumstances are simply extensions of your dominant thoughts and perceptions. So stop blaming others for your loneliness and see it as a mind challenge that has to be defeated.
- Commit to positive changes. Unless you are willing to change, nothing else changes. So the first step to recovery is the willingness to do things differently. When you decide to reach for a better experience in life, even the universal law of intention will conspire with you to make it happen. So, decide right now that you are ready to fight and conquer loneliness. Resolve in your mind that you will do whatever it takes to reconnect to life again and enjoy the tremendous benefits of being a social being. Massive positive changes often start with a small step in a right direction. And your desire to commit to positive changes concerning your loneliness could be this small step that sets big and rewarding changes in motion.
- Acknowledge and adequately process your past negative emotions, produced from your past hurts, rejections, disappointments and failures. When negative emotions are not effectively dealt with or come to terms with, they eventually force the mind to detach from the real-self and the world. And the results, amongst others, can be chronic stress, anxiety panic disorders, heart disease, chronic pain and other psychosomatic illnesses. You can request for my FREE eBook: The Essential Guide To Anxiety Panic Recovery here. This manual will help you to process all your negative emotions effectively and also kick out your anxiety disorders.
- Begin to connect with others. If you are suffering from loneliness (caused by real-self alienation), one of your real fears is people. Psychologically you dread people hurting you in one form or the other. And you loneliness is a way your subconscious mind protects yourself from this potential threat. But the only way to conquer your fear is by facing it. So force yourself into social connections with other human beings. Develop a hatred for isolating yourself from the world. As already mentioned in my previous article entitled Overcoming Loneliness, loneliness means you are disconnected from your real-self within, and that is why it seems the world around you is disconnected with you. But the only way you can reconnect and rediscover yourself again is when you throw yourself back into the world to socialise, without fear, insecurities or inferiority complex. You can achieve this by starting to do things with others, such volunteering together with others, dancing together, playing together, going for a walk together, praying together, belonging to an interest group together and enjoying together with other humans.
- Look beyond yourself and your problems, and put the needs of others first. It is impossible to remain lonely, when you shift your focus from self to service. That is why those who are in search constantly for problems or needs to solve or meet in their localities are some of the most happiest, healthiest and loveable people on the earth. Loneliness is not really so much about lack of companionship as it is about lack of selfless contributions to the needs of other people. So become a passionate problem-solvers. Focus on creating pleasant experiences and memories for others by helping them get ahead in their challenges or tasks. You will not only make plenty of true friends, but you will also begin to feel a lot better about yourself, thereby increasing your self-image and self-confidence.
- See possibilities in your future. This is important. Unless you believe that your social life will turn out to be great, you are unlikely to take any step to make it great – as we know that great social life requires great positive actions. Belief is extremely miraculous. As the success expert, Napoleon Hill’s famous quote says, “Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, the mind can achieve.” If you can believe that you will return back to your old self that was happy, sociable and passionate about life and people, you will most certainly come out of your loneliness and shine again in life. Even if you have no memory of social happiness in your life, you can break your own record. You can re-write your personal history. You can break new grounds. You can create an incredible future, if only you can believe and start seeing a different future experience that knows no loneliness, but only positive associations, meaningful friendships and tremendous service to humanity.
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